It Sucks To Be A Noob: D&D

This is the first installation of a series we’re going to be doing. Since I know absolutely nothing about D&D, I decided to attempt it. Here is my story and experience and I hope you enjoy!

I chose to dive into Dungeons & Dragons after watching a movie called Dorkness Rising. I was completely unaware of the complexity that goes into a single game and as I left my first game, arms laden with Player Handbooks 1, 2, and 3 so I could create a character of my very own, it occurred to me that this journey would be life altering and addicting. I’d attempted to come to several games before out of curiosity but it never panned out so I made sure to attend my first one last week at the behest of my friend, Andrew.

The game I attended was a 3.5 edition and I was supposed to play the character of a player not in attendance. I was lost with the first D20 roll and I opted to watch instead. I was guided through bits and pieces by the DM (that’s Dungeon Master) and Andrew as the game was played. I thank the gods I have played numerous video game RPG’s with classes and stats so a lot of the terminology and stuff were second nature and easy to remember.

D&D seems like fun to just hang out and watch because the other players really get into their characters and it makes for a fun and hilarious environment. As an example, a player’s very large character is the runt of his family and so speaks in a high pitched voice which makes for amusing exchanges.  Another player’s character is very loose and thoroughly learned in the arts of love and can use those skills to get out of tough situations.

When I left my first game, my head swimming with newfound knowledge and details, I was determined to craft my own character for today’s game. It would be 4th edition (a much simpler edition than 3.5, I am told) so some classes were not allowed. I blazed through PHB 1 and decided on a female Tiefling. I constructed her background per the handbooks and named her Varys.  I wrote a decent back story (a tale of beheading and secrets) and then settled in for the hard part: her statistics and skills. Without copying and pasting a crap ton of pages, let me just tell you, it took 3 out of the 5 hours I took to make Varys. This could be because in my utterly noob-ness, I made several mistakes, am bad at math, or whatever lie you’d like to make up. I plagued my friend with random D&D questions until I filled out as much of her character sheet as possible and brought her along to the game I’m going to join. Turns out I had several blank areas that I had overlooked (HELLO, every character needs armor and a weapon hahaha) and used the game time to watch and absorb more details and to tweak my character further due to the campaign world changes.

I unveil Varys, the purple haired, eclipse born Tiefling, in a week and a half and all she wants is closure from a certain Sorcerer King.