1. More dialogue exists in Wall-E than this movie. More dialogue might also exist in the silent movies of the 1920s.
2. The troll with no eyes and no limbs deserves justice and if you don’t think that what Legolas did to him was a hate crime you’re wrong. Also maybe that’s where Legolas got his eyes from and that’s why he has special abilities?
3. The reason there are so many white men is because they are all just cardboard stand-in versions of one guy. They didn’t want to invest too much in the movie, because the whole point of it was to wring the IP of every last penny, so a few corners were cut.
4. Orcs have temper problems but, much like the rancor, it is not their fault. As the legendary writer Lady Gaga would say, “baby, you were born this way.” I mean the rancor wasn’t–he was tortured and starved by Jabba–but the Orcs, they were definitely born that way.
5. The fact that this movie is named “The Hobbit” is actually a huge spoiler as he is the only character who survives to the end, where the true nature of the film is revealed. It is a tragic commentary on the growing affinity for socialism in America. Do you really want to be Bilbo in an empty hobbit hole? No? Then don’t vote for Obama.
6. Bard and Thorin at the wall was the first and last time Thorin ever listened to shit. You think the dwarf king needs to subject himself to such humility? He does not. Humility cannot be measured in gold and therefore does not concern the king. Further more:
7. The king only listens to the king… Unless he is being swallowed up by some weird gold dream. Also is he really ever listening if he hasn’t dramatically announced it? No. The answer is no.
8. Thorin’s gold floor was real but Dumbledore’s beard was 30% CGI.
9. No potatoes were harmed in the making of this film, though Peter Jackson’s reputation with women took a massive hit.
10. Rancors are still cool and cute.Jen Schiller
Staff Writer
twitter.com/Jenisaur
We received a link to a super secret livestream done by Peter Jackson featuring a sneak peak at The Desolation of Smaug. Who knows how long Warner Brothers will allow us to have this up for you, but enjoy it while you can! The clip gives a first glance at Turiel, played by Evangeline Lily as well as a familiar face. Enjoy.
Click to watch the preview (don’t worry, we have made sure it’s safe!!!)
Peter Jackson just put out a new production video for The Hobbit. Enjoy!
Please enter the url to a YouTube video.Whatever your plans are for this weekend, enjoy them and be safe everyone.
Peter Jackson and crew have released a new video journal for The Hobbit, going into details on the cameras they are using, 3-D and how even the make-up artists have to take different colors into consideration, and forty-eight Red Epic camer…. wait… forty-eight Red fucking Epic cameras?!?!? Those cost around 50, 000$ each. Oh I hate you Peter Jackson, but I love you at the same time.
Please enter the url to a YouTube video.Hit the jump if you want to see their other three video journals.
In the upcoming two-part prequel to his Lord of the Rings phenomenon, Peter Jackson has announced a new character among his all-star lineup, and as usual, his casting couldn’t be more perfect. Evangeline Lilly will be stepping out of the LOST forests of Hawaii and into the Mirkwood forests of Middle-Earth as an ethereal Elven beauty written specifically for The Hobbit.
Taking place before Lord of The Rings, back when Bilbo was even smaller, The Hobbit will return us to Jackson’s visual orgasm of Middle-Earth where we be seeing more of the familiar faces we’ve grown to love, (Ian McKellen’s Gandalf comes first and foremost to mind) cameos from fan favorites that we just can’t do without, and even meeting some new characters along the way. This recent announcement fills out most of the major casting decisions, as Jackson plans to flesh out the roles that the many unnamed Mirkwood Elves play in the novel.
Jackson immediately took to his Facebook page to confirm the casting and taunt us with teensy scraps of information, stating, “Her name means ‘daughter of Mirkwood’ and, beyond that, we must leave you guessing! (No, there is no romantic connection to Legolas.)” No other details have been specified except for the name of the Jackson-invented character, Tauriel.
Adding the character has generated a lot of mixed feelings and even some spouts of nerdrage amongst the Ringer Purists, but the point remains the same – how visually bland would it be to visit Tolkien’s Mirkwood? Two characters are mentioned by title only, and even their roles are minor. It’s hard to feel an attachment to faceless characters, and the idea that there would be no lovely Elven ladies wandering the forest is ludicrous at best.
Evie’s future seemed ready to take off after the LOST finale, while at the same time a rumor was circulating that she had no intention of returning to acting – a statement met with dismay, as there are very few ladies in the biz with the kind of natural talent and beauty that this dimpled dame does. The rumor seemed more and more likely to solidify once she moved from LOST to boring, generic L’Oreal commercials, but those at least were more legitimate than LiveLinks. Now she looks to be coming back from her acting hiatus with the blockbuster work that was expected of her immediately after the LOST finale, with at least one movie released per year until 2013. It may not be much, but I’m getting my fix!
Now that the initial hype has started dying down and more people are getting used to thinking of Evie in Elven garb, details about what kind of personality her character will have still remain elusive. Will we be seeing the ancient Elven ancestor of Kate Austin? Will she pull an Eowyn and kick some ass at the Battle of Five Armies? Or will she follow the Liv Tyler path – stand around, look pretty, here’s a tear? Unfortunately for us, Jackson is good with handling leaks, so it looks like we have a year to wait before we meet Tauriel. I always hope for brunette badasses, personally.
Whatever the case may be, I’m even more pumped now to see The Hobbit than I was before. Didn’t think that was even possible. And after seeing the EE’s, I completely trust in Jackson’s choices regarding Tolkien’s world 100%, this being no exception. Don’t you?